Kindness as a Fierce Act of Self-Compassion

Kristin Neff who is a pioneer in the studies on self-compassion defines self-compassion as how we’re with (com) suffering (passion). It involves doing a U-turn and treating yourself the same way you would treat a close friend or loved one when they are suffering.

Self-compassion is a concept that holds three parts-kindness, humanity, and mindfulness. Each one of these parts plays a role in your overall well-being.

Today we will be focusing on the kindness aspect of self-compassion.

Kindness Aspect of Self-Compassion

In the same way, we would comfort a friend when they are struggling, we can do the same thing for ourselves.

Rather than responding to your pain with fierce self-criticism and denying yourself of your thoughts and feelings, you can instead treat yourself with warmth and kindness.

After all, in a society that profits from your self-doubt, liking yourself is a rebellious act. (Caroline Caldwell).

Instead of expecting more and more of yourself and treating yourself as if you are a robot, reflect on what you have learned from the situation. Treat yourself with kindness knowing that the next time you try you will be starting from new experiences.

Acts of Kindness for Yourself

You are the only person you will spend your whole life with. Given this fact, it is important to make sure that we are treating ourselves with the kindness and warmth we need to live a life worth living.

Here are some kind acts you can do for yourself:

• Write yourself a letter

• Take a trip to your favorite place

• Buy yourself your favorite food

• Pamper yourself

• Do a spa day

• Take a relaxing bath

• Read a book

• Watch your favorite show or movie

• Go for a walk with a friend

• Celebrate an accomplishment

• Give yourself a compliment

• Prepare a picnic in the park

• Support a cause you love

• Cross an item off your budget list

Work toward trying to counter each of your negative thoughts and acts of criticism, with an act of kindness.

Forgiveness is also at the core of kindness. It is important to recognize that you are human and to forgive yourself for your mistakes.

Affirmations and Quotes for Self-Kindness

“A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve.” — Joseph Joubert

“Compassion isn’t about solutions. It’s about giving all the love that you’ve got.” — Cheryl Strayed

“Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you.” — Princess Diana

“Remember, there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.” — Scott Adams

"I am enough and I will always be enough."

"I matter and my worth is inherent."

Join the Friendly Company Community for Additional Ideas

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